With chaos in the house and the mother of multiple children, I have to tell you this woman I am about to write about has really made an extra effort to know and find God in the most basic and childish way. However, the rewards of her efforts has led her to Christ and she has now converted into the "Acceptance" stage of being Baptized. Her major concern with finding out who she was started years ago when she found that her heart, mind and soul was lost. The travels of everyday life running back and forth in the daily routine has made her confused and challenged her being. She set out trying to find what it was that was missing, left her family and began exploring the unknown. Lifestyles came her way, being controlled by men in sexual ways made her feel powerless and yet, full of control knowing she could get what she wanted. They bought her clothes, shoes, jewelery, accessories, toys and paid bills. Not the typical young woman who just wanted to date a guy and use him for what he gave, but dated multiple men of different ages and took what they offered. Life was easy and rolled on fast. There was no stopping between the internet, the dating, the texting, the late phone calls and oh yes, the sleeping! It was a 24/7 full time job. Periodically, there was a dead spot of silence in visiting her children and spending time with girlfriends out on the town, however, the second a man phoned, she dropped her plans and rushed for the fun.
Her physical pain began with her sexual addiction and another new lifestyle began. It was not enough to have normal partners. So she began searching for family groups that involved more activity. Their functions were to gather and enjoy each others company after hours and into the early morning. Something was still missing. More alcohol was needed to take in everything that was happening in her life. Too many partners at one time was stimulating but now the sight of that behavior was sickening to the reality that it was against everything she grew up with in the Christian faith. So her struggles deepened as she cried about her lost set of mind. Her difficulty in realizing this behavior was not really fun but actually painful and over stimulating her body in a hurtful way. Confusion and sorrow hit her heart. The unknown silence that people were praying for her, asking God to protect her and to open her eyes to what pain was really all about.
We became friends and started talking daily. There really was not alot in common, except that we had a mutual understanding that we were different and that we accepted each other for whom we were. Periodically she would call asking for my opinion. Although, there are alot of things that could be said, my answers tried to reflect the same positive message... "You are loved. You are not alone. You are good." After awhile, I felt silly in saying this knowing that it was not meant to keep God out of His role, so I started saying, "God loves you, God is always with you. And the Bible says You are good!" The same message occurred somewhere in every conversation. I did not care where it was at, but I found a way to place it creatively. Then one day, she told me about her issues and openly said, she wanted some help. So I asked her if I could give her one assignment and that if she were to do it, I would not ask her to do anything more. She replied slowly, "okay". So I said, I had a friend who had a sexual addiction and I asked her to pray one Our Father every night before she went to bed and after a year, she called me up and told me that she noticed she had not been involved with any sexual activity for one year and that she was now with one man and no longer running around with a field of men. I told her that is all I asked her to do too. She agreed to do it.
Every day or few days we talk and catch up on the daily news. We laugh, we cry, we struggle and we ask to pray for something in a swift way. But then one day, I received a text message saying she accepted Christ! I was over joyed. She had also accepted responsibility in not participating in anymore of her routine and family inappropriate sexual behaviors. To become a new and let God take her over. She started becoming mindful of her issues and quit the lifestyles. Although, it is a daily struggle, I am so proud to know her and to know that she has made an incredible effort to change her life.
There will always be a struggle in our lives with our addictions but with prayer All Things Are Possible In Christ. I can tell you that Jesus loves every child and He will not fail anyone.
If you struggle with Sexual Addiction, I encourage you to pray the most perfect prayer that Christ taught us. It is so simple and easy to say before you sleep.Let God do His Mysterious Job and you begin to see your life renew in peace!
Our Father, who art in Heaven, Hallowed be Thy Name. Thy Kingdom Come, Thy Will Be Done on Earth as it is in Heaven.
Give us This Day, Our Daily Bread, and Forgive us our trepasses, as We Forgive those who trespass against us and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.
AMEN
Tags: Conversion Sexual Addiction Forgiveness Story
